Miami Pt 2

Miami is wild. We did a pub crawl again on Wednesday. The guy who sold it to us was called Reggie and he gave us his ‘business card’ which was his Instagram handle and a picture of him in his underwear on the beach. Interesting. He asked for our numbers so he could text us the details later on. Little did we know he would use our numbers to offer a “bang by a black dick” at 2am and invite us to his house the next day. We politely declined.

The second pub crawl was way better than the first. We went to some good bars and after a week of hearing nothing but Despacito it was nice to hear some hip hop music and pretend I was a G again. Flashbacks of my drunk dance moves are still making me cringe though. We made friends with an Australian guy called Peter (who we named Sebastian for some reason) at our hostel a few days ago and he came with us to the bars. He didn’t get into the club because it was ladies night apparently. Rude.

We did some more chilling a hotel pool the other day and lay in the hammock for about 2 hours. I’ve never been so relaxed in my life.

After that we went back to the hostel and were in one of those moods where everything is funny because you’re tired. Delirious. Our Spanish roommates came back at night. One of them was furious that my friend’s stuff was all over the floor. He picked up a towel and shouted “piso” and kept saying it over and over. When his friend told him “floor” he started shouting “all on de floor” which I found kinda funny anyway. Then he found the Babybell that I’d lost the day before and asked really angrily “whose cheese is this?”. I had no choice but to laugh in his face because he was standing there in his shorts with his hand on his hip. Like an angry mum shouting at her kids for being messy.

I left the room and sat outside on my own to get some peace. 5 minutes later some Colombian guy tried to start a conversation by asking “is that water?” as he pointed to my see-through water bottle… containing clear liquid… that also said water in huge letters on the front. He kept mentioning the water bottle so I went to bed after 10 minutes of that in between updates on his life.

On Tuesday we went to Miam cafe (fab) for breakfast with Jen and our new friend Chichi. Then we had a walk around Wynwood walls to take some photos.

Vivian and I wanted to Couchsurf here for our last few days to save a bit of money and also so I could give it a second chance. We looked at some profiles and read their references before sending 2 messages. One replied saying they were out of town. The other one said he could potentially host us but needed to know the answers to the following questions before he would accept:

  1. Will you clean up after yourselves?
  2. Will you cook at least one meal?
  3. Are you open to trying nudism?

Weird. Hostel it was. We are now in a 12 bed dorm with triple bunks but it’s half the price of the other one. Sleep is a thing of the past but we don’t need to share with guys so it’s not that bad. It’s right in the middle of all the bars and craziness. And strange sights. Like dogs wearing shoes.

Today we went to the beach with my friend Daman. We were swimming and suddenly saw everyone on the sand gathering, shouting at us to get out. They were all staring at one particular spot but we couldn’t understand what was going on. We quickly got out then found out it was a baby shark. Later on we also saw a massive stingray in the water when we were at the pier. I had no idea Miami beach had such jungle madness going on but glad we lived to tell the tale.

When we got back I met a Jamaican guy in the hallway who told me he was a photographer and wanted to take some “white girl photos” with me at the beach. Haha. I talked to him for about 2 minutes then went to sit in the lounge. I was minding own my business when he came over and said “this is for you”. Then walked away.

So strange. It looked suspicious and fake so I didn’t drink it.

I have three more days left on the road before I go home to Scotland and have to get my life together. I’m making the most of the sunshine (and being able to swim in the ocean without catching a disease) while I can.




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